Love Hurts

Love hurts maybe for a woman more than a man. Why do I say so? Well women are definitely the more emotional type and do I say so because I see them struggle with hormonal swing and drift from one mood to the another?

Man on the other hand, and I'm talking about the stereo type men who leads the family, do the "Man's" job, is where the buck stops to take all responsibilities etc, becomes the seemingly less emotional type, some times cold to make decisive actions and seemingly 'cold as ice' as I was accused of when I was a voluntary missionary of 21 years of age by some other women I was trying to avoid by following the advice of President Kimball, the head of our Church at that time who had taught to 'lock your heart' and keep the key at home while called on a mission. It served me well to experience an ultimate joy of service and built deep spiritual roots personally to climb mountains of my life as shared here.

I returned on my mission to find a wonderful and talented woman to be my wife who was better schooled than me in our Church as she joined as a young woman while I became a convert only when I was turning 21. We started a true love story that ended with her passing but 'familylane' stories continue. Yes love hurts, not just in separation by death but some times due to separation caused by other reasons such as physical, mental and spiritual divisions. This goes back to my body mind spirit philosophy where everyone defers in intensity of each component of ourselves and how they work together to create each person to have his or her own unique traits or personality. As the saying goes, "Everyone is Different" and naturally so. Irreconcilable differences can cause more hurts in breakups and divorces which create even greater and longer hurts.

We therefore must remember the introductory lines of the last post, "Love is in us. It is deeply embedded in the brain. Our challenge is to understand each other." Using a Body Mind Spirit approach, it might cover the need to forgive one another, to learn about how another can be different from us and can still be loved and believe that a loving Heavenly Father is there to help us understand him and his plan on this earth for all of us to be happy together.

I remember two quotations about relationships that my wife and I would sometimes joke about. It is about whether which is true, 'The heart grows fonder when physically apart' or 'Out of sight out of mind'? In today's modern world, I've felt that a third option has been created where both may be physically apart yet may not be out of sight with each other with the use of online video chats and social media tools like facebook etc to keep our minds connected! I think this question arose in the past and even today in this new relationship of 'Didi and Boynie' due to the mobility that I had acquired in order to adapt to the new world of travel for family, work and even for spiritual purposes!
Clicking here to see my extensive travel map over time explains why my wife and/or companion may feel hurt when I am away for missing me too much.

My extensive travel to China in search of my ancestral village and also my return trip to Singapore to be the "Be there Dad" for the boys especially when there is an event of theirs may be causing my future wife and companion growing hurts out of missing me too much. Before that I had a business trip to the US and also to visit family there!

After attending Han's performance at the Esplanade, I thought I would create the video below as an appeasement to her online for the relationship of Didi and Boynie! I was exhilarated to feel the theme of all the songs they sang was about love and I chose just their first song for this video with a little touch of personalization at the end, hoping that she can catch it!


After I posted the video clip I made to youtube and played it, the video of the singer Adele happened to play automatically after. Now here is a singer I felt after listening to her who knows how to really express the hurts of love in her songs :



Love hurts when there are arguments



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